I Want a Topic
Lynna Seipel

It’s hard to write when your mind is blank. I should know. I can never think of a topic, or I think too much and can never decide which topic to use. My head is either full of nothingness that takes over and flows onto paper making it look an even more ghastly shade of white, or my brain is on over drive and eventually turns to mush. I think too much to pinpoint a target and fire the gun. And when I do, my words splat and drip onto the paper, but make no sense at all in their jumbled mixture of sporadic thoughts. So it's in the unfortunate times like these that I want, no wait, need a topic.

I could be told to write something, which I am extremely capable of doing, but the process of actually getting an idea to sprout from my brain that I can actually embellish and care for is the hard part. If you handed me an empty canvas and told me to paint, I would probably have a stress attack. If you gave me a crisp sheet of college rule, and told me to write an essay I would look at you like you were crazy. I need guidelines. I need rules. Lines on a paper aren’t enough for me to follow. I need to be shoved in the right direction. Things need to fit like a puzzle in my mind, and I can’t even think about starting a puzzle if you gave me no pieces to connect.
When I don’t have a clear-cut path, I usually tend to swerve and slip off. I’ll loose track of where I am, of what I’m supposed to be doing, or worse just go and go. But when I look back at what I’ve done is see that it’s all a bunch of clichés, boring words, and things that don’t make any sense at all. Thing won’t turn out the way I wanted, so I’ll try to fix them, but I never know where to start. I need guidance. You can’t just let me walk a crooked line practically blindfolded. I want a direction, a topic, a reason and a highway to drive.